i have been on fedi for over two years and there has been a huge uptick in crazy bullshit since last summer, i think that was when there was a big reddit ban wave that drove lots of angry/violent people here.

there are some really good threads I stumble across that are mostly good content with shitty inflammatory content downvoted.

but most are full of inflammatory shrill idiots trying to one-up each other about how leftist they are.

the biggest differentiator is word count of the comments.

dating was like that before online dating apps. you just went to bars or clubs with a lot of people.

they used to be called ‘single’s bars/clubs’ for a reason… because people went there to shop.

Everyone is a stranger until you get to know them. Dating is one way of getting to know somebody. But I don’t think it’s ever ‘accidentally’.

10oz is a normal mug. a big mug is 20oz.

unless you use tea cups as your ‘normal’ mug or something? tea cups are 4oz.

you are probably drinking close to a 1000mg a day dude. that’s a lot of caffeine. the rec daily dose is like 400mg, which is 3 8oz cups.

do you make it?

I can’t find any good roasters that make half caf blends. usually at best they have one mediocre decaf. occasionally there is a really good decaf and i will just blend it myself 50/50 with another coffee.

only one roaster around me makes half caf and it’s not regularly available.

minimum of 1 cup of coffee and 1 cup of tea per day. sometimes more.

i can’t drink caffeine after 3pm or coffee after noon.

there are tons of different stitching arts. they use different mediums, threads, and techniques.

my sister has done cross stitch her entire life. it’s basically pixel art irl.

My least favorite things about it aren’t really specific to lemmy. It’s just the victimhood/doomerism culture here, that generates a ton of hateful angry commentary and the witchhunt mentality of so many of the users is revolting behavior.

But I’m not angry at the world and using lemmy to cope I guess. Like OG reddit, I mostly want to use lemmy to read interesting commentary on interesting events and stories and try and learn something, or articulate and add new POV to discussions. Unfortunately the cultural at large… hates this and sees all arguments/perspectives as a zero sum game where anyone who isn’t confirming/supporting them 100% must also be denying them.

I also don’t get the endless moralizing. I liked a lot how early reddit wasn’t full of moralizing types, and I really hated it when those types of people gained traction and started playing comment police.

the communities here that thrive have massive superiority complexes.

the reason hobby subs here don’t thrive is the userbase here isn’t interested in being humble or chill the way many such communities are humble and chill.

It’s a moral prop. Sort of like pedophilia is for the right, for the left trans issues lets them concern troll and beat everyone over the head with how noble they are for supporting it and how evil anyone is who doesn’t agree 110%. Most of the comments I see about trans issues on here are not even positive, they are mostly ‘if you don’t support trans rights 120% and believe in the removal of heterosexuality, you’re a bigot/nazi/genocide supporter’. It’s insane. but I have no doubt people genuinely think that way because I know ones like that IRL. They tend to be deeply insecure and fragile people who’s coping mechanism is just being insanely irrationally angry. They are just the leftist MAGA types of people.

People do this IRL all the time. It’s how people are. They aren’t kind and thoughtful.

I have people jump down my throat and start lecturing me about myself on weekly basis IRL. I even have them harass me while I’m minding my business reading a book in a cafe… because it’s an ‘bad’ book.

I also regular have people try to start arguments with me while I’m walking my dog on the street.

I’m afraid of the harassment and being banned.

All it takes is a little dogpiling and usually the mod piles on too and bans you.

lemmy doesnt’ really do DMs yet, but if it did I can bet I’d be getting TONS of nasty DMs from weirdos who take internet comments personally.

There is some diversity… it’s just you get harassed for being different and it takes a really tough mentality to ignore it or a really huge block list.

It’s not depression. It’s identity politics they believe in and that necessary leads to absurd beliefs.

I don’t know, pessimism seems to be the norm. IRL I live in one of the richest zip codes in America… and pretty much every convo I have or overhear is people whining about how life sucks and how hard it is and how mean everyone else is to them.

We live in a ‘victim hood’ culture these days. People aren’t proud of things anymore or optimistic, it’s an arms race to see who can the most pessimistic and whiny.

The only time I hear or interact with people being positive it’s mostly them talking abotu self-help crap or whatever ‘therapy’ they are using to ‘help them cope’.

No. But I’ve been accused of this sort of thing by people before.

could be worse. you could choose and she could enjoy it and then hate you for being right. I had an ex who broke up with me for this very reason.

i had roommates in a city where you don’t need a car who would drive their car to work rather than walk a KM. If you asked them why it was ‘it’s too far to walk’.