Yes. I have been thrown against a wall and very intimately frisked by police for looking at them wrong.

But - that was in LA when cops there were basically just a well armed gang. I’ve never experienced anything that crazy since.

Oh Holy Night is amazing.

Fall on your knees! Hear the angel voices!

Chains he shall break, for the slave is our brother, and in his name all oppression shall cease!

I only have one data point but my kid’s teachers (high school) have always both called my kid their preferred name and pronouns. I did get “the letter” this year to send back saying it was ok. Ridiculous.

This is just such a mess, why oh why.

What I really and truly can’t understand are the parents. How can you be THAT controlling? What do they think it’s going to accomplish?

If your life sucks, that can be exhausting. I agree with orbituary - do yoga and calisthenics.

No, that doesn’t sound normal. If you are dead idle physically, maybe. If so, try increasing your physical activity gradually then exercise.

But if the exhaustion persists, insist on getting screened for diseases, maybe you have something treatable?

I will say my 30s were the WORST and it got better in my 40s and have maintained healthy. Was just thinking the other day about how I feel really good, and weigh 10lb more than I want to but not sure I should try to lose it, maybe healthy just doesn’t look exactly like I want it to!

Appearance makes such a difference. Yes, being pretty makes it easier to get things done, people want to do things for you.

But now, as a middle-aged, averagely good looking white woman, what I notice is people trust me. When I was younger and presumably prettier I got stopped by the police a lot, stopped in customs, there was some friction just because I stood out, yes? Now, I can smoothly just slide through all sorts of security screenings - at concerts they often don’t even look in my bag, and people confide in me all the time. Apparently now I look trustworthy.

All these things we don’t choose, and have no control over, advantage and disadvantage us.

Kimchi grilled cheese is incredible, I would absolutely try sauerkraut grilled cheese.

Well I am hosting the !cocktails@lemmy.world community, we welcome you!

The ones I miss are the local city sub, haircare/curly hair, and the nonsexual nude threads, normal nudes and naked progress, and the draw me nsfw.

We got a refrigerator. Needed one anyway but rushed it a couple months back because I saw the writing on the wall.

About 1:1:2, coffee, juice, sparkling water. I really like it a lot. Has to be fresh orange juice.

Unsweetened cold brew coffee, fresh orange juice, and sparkling mineral water. It sounds most foul but tastes so good, sparkling smokey orange.

My dad used to make this for us when we were kids

This does sound like she has depression, and needs to address that before working on the relationship.

If it was not so obvious, I would have said she’s checked out of the relationship, but reading the whole post, I don’t think that’s it, it’s more like she’s just checked out of life in general, so I will hope she gets help and finds her energy and libido and joy again.

Then they can work out a schedule to balance the effort. Some of our “rules” are:

If I cook and you eat, you clean, and vice versa.

We make the bed together.

If the toilet paper runs out replace it!

If the dogs or cats need water, fill it!

Outdoors I do everything (garden, weeding, flowerbeds out front) except mowing and edging, husband does those.

I make all design decisions for the house because I have a better eye, husband makes all vacation plans because he’s good at that.

I’m sure there’s a million ways to set things up to leverage individual strengths and talents and still be balanced enough but none will work without commitment from both people, you do have to want it.

So in that case, all disabled people should live in poverty because it’s not fair if only some do? If we can’t help everybody then nobody should be helped? I’m not sure that’s a great goal to achieve.

I’m not sure how you jumped to this. My point is that if more of the money went back into society in general, maybe all disabled people who could not work could get a more reasonable amount of money and care and live more comfortably, instead of the few who have a rich uncle.

I guess I just feel like the playing field should be a lot more even at the start. So if you have above whatever the threshold is when you die, all to taxes and all those into a pot sort of like social security, to go to every kid not just your kid. I don’t know what the line would be, and do know that in this world, rich people would still find some loophole to financially advantage their kids, I just find it immoral.

If the world worked so that everyone could leave a windfall then that would be a different world. In this world yes I think it’s bad, the results have been bad, and yeah I know that’s an unpopular stance.

I don’t think my mom owed me what she made with her life. It’s not mine, I didn’t earn it. I didn’t have to support her, she spent her money and not more. That’s fine.

The disabled cousin might not need the windfall if we didn’t let people hoard so much. I’m just not sure how it’s morally acceptable for those who have rich generous relatives to have a life so different from someone who doesn’t, though.

A few things help me.

Short commute, so no extra time spent getting to and from the office, and an electric bike that I enjoy commuting on.

Coffee and breakfast at my desk at work, not before going in.

Help at home - husband cleans after supper, and we have a biweekly cleaning lady so I’m not spending all weekend just catching up, can have at least a day to actually relax.

The people I work with are amazing, I like them so much and they like me and each other, it’s a good group.

Taking all my PTO. I do a lot of Fridays off, and usually one solid week off at some point but using them to make short weeks/long weekends feels best to me.

If you really can’t adjust maybe ask about doing the 40 as 4x 10hours not 5x 8?

No, actually. I got tattoos way back when it was a shocking thing for a woman to do, am really so shocked myself that they became popular. Thought I might not like them when I was in my 30s/40s but knew I’d like them when I was old. But as it turns out, I liked having them straight through and still do.

Scars I do like too.

I think inheritance of money is bad. It seems to be some agreed upon good, you should leave money and assets to your children. But WTF? This drives inequality, generational wealth accumulates and so does generational poverty. I think the world would be better if it was more use it or lose it, and you couldn’t pass it on like that. Or not so much at least.

I agree with this wholeheartedly. A house is to live in. It’s a place to live, not a financial instrument. They are only inherently worth some amount that aligns with wages in a given location.

So, like my first house cost a year of the median wage in my city; it was a wreck, so let’s say two years of pay was the average house. I think my mom’s house was around that too, but now they are more like 5x the median pay, that makes no sense because they are the same thing - a place to live.

No. I don’t care about living long, but do care about feeling good, and figure I have a body and might as well take care of it. Not obsessive by a long shot but eat well, exercise, sleep. All that feels good.