As of today, someone born in 1999 was the same age as Marilyn Monroe was when she was born. Makes you think.

Oh, I was just planning to steal their PS5 and flat screen.

TIL the ISS astronauts are sitting ducks.

I like this version. Very to the point.

Couldn’t have been much clearer, but nobody bothers to read the published articles:

I don’t cry.

Until I do, then I REALLY cry.

It’s a catapult of Trump steaks.

gonna be a wild 4 lifes.

Pretty sure the realtor was supposed to handle all of that.

TIL a cucumber is a banana.

Data leaks are about to get even more personal.

Alien: fine! it sure would be a shame if something happened to these lovely polar ice caps…we shall slowly but surely shift your planet’s entire climate, until eventually you will boil like lobsters and the oceans rise!

It was a years-long mistake–I stopped buying Skittles entirely.

When they announced they were FINALLY fixing their nasty green apple mistake, I was briefly hopeful this awful timeline was finally healing itself.

Actually, yeah, that may well be a “me” thing. I shouldn’t presume. It really helps me feel more alert in the morning when taken before bed, I’ve noticed, having tested just Melatonin and the two together repeatedly, but I shouldn’t presume everyone would need it. Though, it’s Vitamin D, so it probably won’t kill you.

Thank you!

Try Melatonin and Vitamin D about an hour before bedtime.

I believe “shirtless photo on horseback” might be the next stage.

Phew, crisis averted.

Gave me a little coughing fit, but I have a head cold, so I’m an easy target.