I got this beat.

My dad was a drunk sleepwalker and a nude sleeper. One time I had a friend over and we were watching something in the living room late at night when my dad kinda meanders behind us and sits on the recliner and passes out, full monte. It was super embarrassing, plus, I’m fairly sure he intended to sit on the toilet but missed his mark by, like, three whole-ass rooms.

Thankfully he didn’t relieve himself. Night was still a bit awkward after that, trying to ignore the bass-heavy snarling sound of my father’s drunken snoring behind us while we attempted to carry on. Told my mom she needs to lock the bedroom door from now on 😅

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That’s not a luxury, it’s free.

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fuck yeah

Hey honey wake up, new circumcision just dropped

ER-ZONE

Horse sellers were apparently shaking in their boots when automobiles were invented 😆

Fuckin’ WHOOSH

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OP living life 😙👌