Went to the same high school, but didn’t really know each other until end of senior year. I guess I dated a friend of hers briefly. Really met via both of us doing theatre that year, hung out after that and through summer. Bonded over our love of metal music and Doctor Who. Neither of us technically asked the other out, her friend assumed we were dating and was like “You guys haven’t kissed yet?! OK, I’m gonna turn around around, and you’re going to kiss right now!” We kinda just went with it and kissed.

End of summer happened, and the casual summer thing had turned into us being really into each other. Decided to keep dating, making separate colleges work best we could.

Ten years later, we are living together in our own house with our three dogs, and getting married next month!

My mother had just moved in with me and needed hospice care. Some of her meds were very difficult to find locally. The only pharmacy nearby that could accommodate her prescriptions turned out to be one that belonged to the family of her first husband from many years ago. When I went to get her medication the pharmacy tech was very helpful. So helpful that he insisted on escorting me around the store to help me find the supplies I needed. He asked me out in the wound care aisle. Which was as awkward as it sounds. The love of my life began with a hunt for ostomy bags and absorbent gauze. We celebrated our 20th anniversary last month.

We were the only two people at an arts festival after-party that weren’t part of the local arts community; the only two who didn’t already know everyone else at the party. I walked over to her and said, Hey, I was just over there not talking to anybody, and I saw you were over here not talking to anybody, and that just seemed awfully inefficient.

I was just trying to bum a square, I swear.

I met one while out cruising when I was in my 20s.

I met one at work.

I met one at a school, she was an employee there.

I met one on a business trip, I was friends with her dad and she came along with him on the trip (she was only like 3 years younger than me.)

We met on OkCupid. We were on opposite sides of the Atlantic, but she had a friend on this side, and they were comparing the “weird” profiles they were each finding. OkCupid has a “if you liked this person, you might like these more” section, and I appeared in there. She wasn’t really looking to date anyone, but she clicked, messaged me, and we clicked. I moved to the US to be with her after a two-year long distance relationship, and we’ll be celebrating our ten year wedding anniversary next year.

Uni! We were just friends, though very good friends. But still firmly just friends, she was actually in a relationship for a good part of our friendship and I had zero interest in going beyond good friends with her in particular, and I especially knew better than fall for a person in a relationship - I’ve never seen one of these end well. I haven’t been interested in dating for most of my life. But I think that’s because my social life and self esteem has been seriously eeh in middle and high school, while I started really working on a social life in uni. Before jumping to dating I wanted to get a few basics down - a good friend group (ended up being several of them!), a real social life and some 1:1 close friends. Plus my own personal world of hobbies, ambitions and interests. You know - a good world to introduce a person to. At one point, I was feeling finally ready for a relationship and excited to try and accept this possible direction in life. I started acting as someone who’s interested in dating: worked on my appearance and self esteem, got more social and made it a point to socialize with everybody at events. That friend I mentioned earlier actually was on a small personal “Do not date” blacklist, because I didn’t want to ruin our friendship (read: be rejected and see the other person go cold on you until you lose them completely… I had already made that mistake) and she was the person with whom I naturally vibed the absolute best - it was effortless. Who wants to lose the effortoess friend who doesn’t drain their social battery at all?

I guess it was so effortless that when it was supposed to happen it happened, things happened, our friendship was starting to develop in a “dangerous” direction (which was making me feel wary to be fair because I was definitely starting to catch feelings), then at one point she made a move and it felt like an impossible dream come true, like the best case scenario that was so good I was not even considering it as a valid option coming to life. Easily one of the happiest moments of my life. And the rest is history.

Friend of a friend. So cliche.