I’m 31, my husband is 51, and lately I’ve been feeling some baby fever. For the record, kids aren’t a must for me, I’m genuinely happy with or without them, but I think it would be nice to experience that journey. My husband is hesitant, though. Even though he’s very healthy, active, and energetic, he feels like having a child in his 50s might be too late. He also already has a 27-year-old son, and he worries that the big age gap between siblings would feel strange.
I guess I’m just looking to hear what others think about this situation.
I meant more in the sense that every decision you make needs to at the very least take the kid into consideration. When you have a kid it makes everything more expensive, it changes where and how you go on holiday, it changes where and how you go out to eat, etc. When you change careers you risk leaving a kid homeless, not just yourself. When you move to a different country you’re forcing that kid to adapt, not just yourself. Etc.
And that is pretty much all true to an extent. It is largely not what I see from folks who say your kids become your whole life. I’m happy to take my kids into account, but I also leave plenty of space to live for me, too.
Though I will say you still have to go on some vacations by yourself because a vacation with kids is anything but a vacation.