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I was in a long term relationship with someone with a drinking problem. When a drunk person says something to you they fucking mean it. Their filter is weaker and, as I label it “they have the courage to say something that they were afraid to say sober.” When you figure this out everything is easier to understand.
There’s an old saying that the first thought in your head is what you’re conditioned to think, and the second is what you actually think. Kind of an ego/id thing.


