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Flying Squid@lemmy.worldM to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world · 7 months ago

Carb Party!

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Carb Party!

lemmy.world

Flying Squid@lemmy.worldM to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world · 7 months ago
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  • SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    You can dance all night on some MDMA.

    • Flying Squid@lemmy.worldOPM
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      7 months ago

      Sure, but bread is legal.

      And you can probably dance a lot longer if you have ergot poisoning, so make sure you buy that country bread the Amish are selling on the roadside.

    • Agent641@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      How many slices of MDMA?

      • SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world
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        7 months ago

        Depends how thick they are.

      • boomzilla@programming.dev
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        7 months ago

        0.000006 if you’re microdosing

  • riodoro1@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    Regular bread? Fine.

    American „bread”? Naaah.

    It’s wild that in Europe the kind of bread Americans eat is sold as toast bread and considered unhealthy. Everything needs to be processed and neat I guess.

    • hark@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      How about Canadian bread? The address on the advert is in Toronto, Ontario, Canada.

      • MrGG@lemmy.ca
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        7 months ago

        Neat! That address / intersection is a five minute walk from me! Thanks for pointing it out, I wouldn’t have noticed it otherwise (with the ad being so absurd)

    • Dragon Rider (drag)@lemmy.nz
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      7 months ago

      https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/murrlogic1s-wonder-bread-fetish-deviantart-commissions

    • srestegosaurio@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      7 months ago

      I was going to comment the same.

      Here that wouldn’t be considered bread too.

      I like good bread, that’s crap.

  • 𝔄 𝔰𝔢𝔫𝔱𝔦𝔢𝔫𝔱 𝔭𝔦𝔢𝔠𝔢 𝔬𝔣 𝔠𝔥𝔢𝔢𝔰𝔢@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    “OPEN UP, ITS THE DIET AUTHORITY!”

    • Flying Squid@lemmy.worldOPM
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      7 months ago

      “We’ve come to inspect your bread box, sir. You know you are federally required to keep at least one loaf in there at all times to fight communism.”

  • dwindling7373@feddit.it
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    7 months ago

    I love the goofy way in which they tried to make it look like extremely complex science got into it by giving a weird estimate such as “31 minutes and an half”.

  • random@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    7 months ago

    for anyone wondering: one slice of TOAST has 134kcal (at least the one I buy), so 6 slices got 804kcal, which isn’t going to satisfy your hunger, it’s malnutrition even, however, you will loose weight very fast on that diet (you’ll also have vitamin and protein deficits in like 12 weeks, so be carefull)

    • hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      7 months ago

      I assumed that this recommends to eat 6 slices of bread daily among with other things.

      • Corkyskog@sh.itjust.works
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        7 months ago

        Nope. No butter, no jam, just bread. Even toasting is discouraged, lest you toast away too many calories.

    • Squirrelsdrivemenuts@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      They don’t advice to eat only bread, just to reduce other foods while eating 6 slices if bread. If bread is whole grain and no added sugars, it’s actually a pretty good source for protein, which is what you want to eat a lot of while dieting to maintain muscle mass.

      • Delphia@lemmy.world
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        7 months ago

        I hate to be all “ackchually” but wheat protein kind of sucks for muscle building. Its only about 50% as digestable and effective as the best sources, its still a better source than processed AF white bread if you cant give up the sandwiches. A great many “protein enhanced” things like oats just dump in a bunch of wheat gluten.

        It still mostly counts towards your daily goals for average people but anyone looking for “gains” should be aiming to get 50% from “high quality” sources like milk protein, eggs, meat and soy.

        https://www.mysportscience.com/post/measuring-protein-quality

        • Squirrelsdrivemenuts@lemmy.world
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          7 months ago

          I didn’t know that, thanks! Guess my whole-grain bread with cottage cheese snack still works 💪

          • Delphia@lemmy.world
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            7 months ago

            I didnt know this until recently either. Its interesting once you start to read the ingredients breakdown on things that have “Protein!” on the label only to realise that (like on the oats I dont buy anymore) it had 4 grams per serving of protein more, but it was just added wheat gluten which has a PDCAAS of .25 so like an extra gram of protein thats actually useful for muscle building…

      • random@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        7 months ago

        yeah, but I think they’re talking about toast, which isn’t very healthy

        • WolfLink@sh.itjust.works
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          7 months ago

          Most of what makes toast unhealthy is the assumption that you put some sort of topping on it.

    • Flying Squid@lemmy.worldOPM
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      7 months ago

      The late, great Cecil Adams once calculated that you can live for about six months on bread alone, not even water, if you eat six loaves a day.

      https://www.straightdope.com/21341369/can-man-live-by-bread-alone

      However, toasting it would remove the water significantly, so you would have to eat a lot more.

  • deegeese@sopuli.xyz
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    7 months ago

    NGL I love me some good bread. 🪿

    • ivanafterall ☑️@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      Bread is addictive, I swear they lace it with quack. duckass

  • IninewCrow@lemmy.ca
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    7 months ago

    The same couple pictured in the ad died of diabetes and heart failure in the 80s.

    • dexa_scantron@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      In their 90s? Gimme some bread and dancing then!

    • Flying Squid@lemmy.worldOPM
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      7 months ago

      I would have thought lung cancer.

  • smokebuddy [he/him]@lemmy.today
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    7 months ago

    Six slices of bread a day seems ludicrous, but two bagels in a day is perfectly cromulent. I’m conflicted

    • Flying Squid@lemmy.worldOPM
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      7 months ago

      If they’re good enough bagels, two in a meal.

    • Hupf@feddit.org
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      7 months ago

      https://youtu.be/Y6lOQUo-su4?t=42s

  • hazardous_area@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    Read the title as crab party and was disappointed when crabs didn’t join the rave.

    • Flying Squid@lemmy.worldOPM
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      7 months ago

      You can’t make a Krabby Patty without bread.

  • shalafi@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    This has been known since prehistory. FFS, we started agriculture to grow the nutritious grains we had found for food and beer, 12,000 years ago.

    And now today! Neolithic tips and tricks!

    • LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      Except they’re wrong! Bread especially the white bread they seem to be touting in this ad, is not only empty calories devoid of nutrients, it’s inflammatory and contributes to brain fog, joint pain, muscle pain, depression, and yes weight gain.

      They’ve got it ALL wrong.

      • Prehensile_cloaca @lemm.ee
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        7 months ago

        But for a short while, it made the shareholders incredible gains…

      • Flying Squid@lemmy.worldOPM
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        7 months ago

        To be fair, you need brain fog to listen to the ultra-white brand of popular music from the 1930s that those two are dancing to.

  • Corkyskog@sh.itjust.works
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    7 months ago

    I like how they had to clarify that you van only get a half hour with the waltz… if you are going to be doing the trot, you only get like 28 minutes of dancing off that bread.

  • Rain World: Slugcat Game@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    bread helps you reduce safety!

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