I’m 31, my husband is 51, and lately I’ve been feeling some baby fever. For the record, kids aren’t a must for me, I’m genuinely happy with or without them, but I think it would be nice to experience that journey. My husband is hesitant, though. Even though he’s very healthy, active, and energetic, he feels like having a child in his 50s might be too late. He also already has a 27-year-old son, and he worries that the big age gap between siblings would feel strange.

I guess I’m just looking to hear what others think about this situation.

    • CoffeeJunkie@lemmy.cafeEnglish
      2·
      4 months ago

      I hope that’s a joke, but if not…women freezing eggs have sometimes encountered huge, huge problems. Huge financial problems, a quick search says 10-15K & often reaching 20K per egg freezing, retrieval procedure. Then $800/yr storage. Then costs for thawing & use. Tbf I see some lower quotes from New Hope but it’s best to overestimate these costs & be pleasantly surprised when they’re lower.

      Freezing of eggs doesn’t guarantee a successful pregnancy or healthy/live baby. A woman boldly wrote a piece called ‘Freeze your eggs, free your career’ and experienced a terrible, across the board dozen egg failure. At least she had the humility to share her story with the world, so they can see & learn from it. Takes a big person to admit maybe they were wrong.

      I advise all wannabe future parents in their 20s to get to fucking. I don’t personally advise having children, but obviously 20s are peak time if you can swing it. Biologically. It’s not going to get any better.

      I am immensely grateful for the egg freezing technology, how you can use it to cheat the infertility of cancer treatments, other bad medical conditions. But it’s still a poor substitute for nature’s plan, no guarantees, and I don’t think it needs to be used by all women everywhere.